Stay away from my posters!
by AmiliaPadfoot
Summary: Post-DH. Don't you just hate it when a poster spontaneously becomes a miniature bonfire? One-shot, mainly from Albus's POV. Used this in an English exam and got an A :)


_**Stay away from my posters!**_

_**By: Amilia Padfoot**_

_Disclaimer:_ Nothing but the plot, people, nothing but the plot.

_Summary:_ Don't you just hate it when a poster spontaneously becomes a miniature bonfire? One-shot, mainly from Albus's POV.

_A/N _Thank you to the brilliant **DramionePerfected **for bettering this for me! What would I do without her?Anyway,this is completely random and I have no idea where it came from or how it got into my head but here it is. Enjoy!

_Albus's feet ached. They really did._ He couldn't remember walking so much before in all his eleven years of existence, but with all the Muggles that were bustling through the streets, filling every nook and cranny, it was hard to find a safe place to apperate, so rather than risk it, the group wandered aimlessly trying to find one. Albus couldn't even remember why his aunt, uncle and dad even needed to visit this Muggle town anyway, so he put it down to the standard Potter/Weasley reason; if you're going to suffer, take someone along with you. He imagined the scenario: Hermione needed to go for the most obscure of reasons, so Ron had been dragged along and if he was going, then he was going to take his best mate with him … and Albus had just chosen the _worst_ possible moment to walk into the room. Though, at this particular moment, he didn't really care why he was there. He wanted to go home, plonk himself on his bed and rest his poor aching legs.

"I'm sure we'll find somewhere soon," he heard his aunt remark from the front of the group.

"You said that five minutes ago 'Mione!" his uncle grumbled. He sounded just as worn out as Albus felt, after being dragged relentlessly from shop to shop by his aunt (who didn't even bother replying to her husband). They turned yet another corner and, to Albus's relief, he noticed that they were now in a much less crowded area. _Now we're getting somewhere!_

"There should be somewhere around here. Let's just walk another couple of streets" Hermione suggested, to be met with the groans of Albus and his uncle. His dad, however, remained silent. Albus looked up at his father, concerned. He wasn't surprised that his dad hadn't complained; he rarely did, especially not about trivial things like walking another couple of streets, but it was odd for his dad to be so quiet. He was about to ask if he was alright when Harry suddenly remarked:

"I remember this place"

"Yeah, you probably do. I bet we've passed it a hundred times. I swear we're going round in bloody circles!" Ron complained. Hermione rolled her eyes in exasperation and his dad shook his head.

"No. I mean I _know_ this place. I think were not too far from Privet Drive" Hermione and Ron shared dark looks at the mention of the place Albus had never heard of before. What was so bad about this _'private drive'_?. His dad was looking off into the distance, his eyebrows furrowed as if trying to remember something. They turned another corner and his dad's eyes widened as if the thing he was trying to remember had suddenly come to him .

"I remember this shop!"

Indeed, they had stopped outside a shop, and one that looked like it had seen better days, at that. The peeling green sign that ran across the top of the entrance read _'S ARKY'S CORN HOP' _with the 'p' hanging off its hinges and several letters obviously missing. It didn't seem the kind of place someone would take the trouble to remember, though, it may have been easy to remember due to the fact that it looked like it hadn't changed its appearance in years. The only thing even slightly colourful or indeed attractive about the worn-down store was a faded and ripped pink poster that took up most of the side of the shop. Intrigued, Albus made to walk towards the poster, but felt a hand on his shoulder holding him back. Before he could turn to see who it was, the shop doors swung open and an ancient looking man stepped out. The man, hunched over and limping, walked towards them; his squinted eyes seemed to narrow into nothingness as he fixed Albus with a scrutinising look, his lips stretched out in a thin line of disapproval. His eyes then widened behind their dusty spectacles as he extended a quivering finger in Albus's direction.

"_You? You! How's this possible? It can't- It-it!_" the man spluttered, looking rather alarmed. Albus had no idea what he had done to make this man so afraid; in fact, he'd never met this man before in his life. He was about to tell man just that when Harry decided to step in front of him and say in an absurdly fake, chirpy voice:

"_Hello_ Mr Jenkins! Long time, no see! How _is_ business?" The man stumbled back against the shop doorway and gaped at Harry as if he was Voldemort himself.

"You! Y-y-you just stay away from my posters! You h-hear me! You stay away from them! I know it was you!" the man accused loudly, stuttering and shaking with a look of sheer terror on his old, crumpled face.

"Look, just calm down, yeah? No-one is going to, er, _hurt_ your posters," Ron tried to soothe the man, trying to keep his voice calm and steady - it was clear Ron thought Mr Jenkins was quite frankly off his rocker, and Albus privately agreed. Jenkins looked from Ron and back to Harry, his eyes narrowed suspiciously. "We're...going...to...leave...now," Ron continued, speaking loudly and clearly, not wanting to set the elderly man off again. Jenkins just glared at Harry as he hissed softly: "I'm watching you", before peering around at Ron and Hermione, pointing at each of them in turn. "I'm watching _all_ of you," and with that, he turned around and hobbled back into the shop, sending one more warning look over his shoulder before he disappeared inside.

"He's bloody balmy, he is!" Ron exclaimed, breaking the shocked silence. "Why would anyone want to hurt his _posters_?"

"Maybe there's just a lot of vandalism in the area." Hermione, ever the logical one, suggested.

"Yea, maybe but what's he accusing Albus for? And he seemed bloody terrified of Harry" Hermione shot him a disapproving look for his language, but didn't comment. Instead, she turned to Harry, who was looking uncomfortable and slightly guilty about something, and asked, "What did you do?". Instead of denying doing anything wrong or indignantly remarking 'Why do you always assume _I_ did something?', like Albus had expected, he rubbed the back of his neck and answered sheepishly,

"I may have um... _set one of his posters on fire once_" he said, all in one breath, as if to prevent himself changing him mind. There was then a silence before the simultaneous cries of "Cool!" and "What?" from Albus and Hermione.

"Wow, Harry, never knew you could be such a rebel!" Ron smirked.

"I was nine! And it was an accident, ok?" He shot back defensively.

"You _'accidentally' _set a poster _on_ _fire_?" Hermione asked faintly. Harry just nodded. "How?"

"Ever heard of this little thing called 'magic', 'Mione? It's this term we wizarding folks tend to toss around a bit. Nothing really important"

"Oh, it was _accidental magic!" _Hermione concluded with the air of someone who had just discovered the answer to a great mystery, while ignoring her in-everything-but-blood brother's sarcasm.

"Pretty impressive. Must have been a bit of a shock for him though, huh?" Ron pondered, snickering a little.

"It was a pretty big shock for me too" Harry muttered.

"If it was accidental magic then why did Mr Jenkins think it was you? I mean it could have been _anything,_" Hermione wondered, frowning slightly.

"Wrong time, wrong place" Harry shrugged and Ron laughed.

"That happens to you a lot, doesn't it, mate?" Even Hermione couldn't help but smile at that, though she still proceeded in her 'interrogation'.

"I still don't get how you did it. I mean, _obviously_, with magic, but you don't just set things on fire like that."

"Yeah. I guess I was just angry"

"Angry at a _poster_?" Ron asked, half bewildered, half amused.

"No. I guess I just _resented_ it." Harry stated, a faraway look in his eyes. Albus shared a slightly concerned look with his aunt and uncle. Ron opened his mouth to speak but closed it again when Hermione shook her head slightly. They continued walking in silence until Albus couldn't bare it any longer. He stopped and turned around to look at the shop. As he hoped there was another pink poster just as ancient looking as the one on the other side of the shop. Ignoring the advertisement completely, he stared at the central image finally understanding why his dad had resented it so much.

A man with black hair and glasses was hugging a beautiful blond woman from behind. The woman was wearing a dazzling smile with perfect teeth. Both adults were gazing down adoringly at the child in the woman's lap who was looking admiringly up at his parents. The boy looked purely and simply happy. Above the man was a weird looking bubble that Albus recognised from the Muggle comics Hugo liked to look at. Written inside was _'__**The perfect family'**_. Albus could easily image his dad hating the poster as a kid or perhaps just the kid in the poster, who eerily enough actually looked somewhat like him. Had his dad wanted to be the kid? To trade places? As if it wasn't enough seeing children in happy families all around him, he had to look at huge posters on walls telling him he didn't have a proper family; a constant reminder. To any unhappy nine year old the poster would have seemed to be mocking them. Even Albus felt like setting the thing on fire, and he _had_ a proper family.

Just then he felt two arms wrap around him. He stiffened, but relaxed as he heard his dad's voice.

"There's no such thing as a perfect family, Al. Those people, those drawings - they aren't real. But you are." His dad ruffled his hair affectionately and Albus looked at his dad as he continued. "Your brother and sister are. You, your mother, your aunts, uncles, cousins... Lots of cousins-" Albus giggled. "-there's no such thing as a perfect family, but by Merlin, I've got near enough perfect and that's more than enough for me. I wouldn't swap places with the boy in the poster for anything, Al. Not for the world." Harry finished, sharing a grin with his son.

_"Me neither, Dad. Me neither"_

**Please review! I'd really appreciate it. 'Family is like fudge- sweet but with a couple of nuts.' - Unknown Author. (Unless you know who wrote, then pray tell me.) Anyway, tell me if you liked it and if you're feeling especially generous why you liked it. –Ami :)**


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